11: "Do You Swipe Right If Their Mate's More Attractive?!" (Dating Q&A)
Listen on: Spotify | iTunes | YouTube | Audible | Amazon Music
"Do You Swipe Right If Their Mate's More Attractive?!"
Who should pay on a first date? How do you deal with rejection? And most importantly, do you swipe right if their mate’s more attractive?!
In this episode of The Date with Confidence Podcast, I’m hosting the first ever dating Q&A and answering the questions you submitted via Instagram. I hope you enjoy hearing my answers as much as I enjoyed recording this!
Here are the questions I answer for you:
1. How do you deal with rejection and turn it into something positive for the next date?
2. How do you stay consistent on dating apps?
3. Dating apps bore me, how can I make this more fun?
4. Are there really some apps better than others?
5. Who should pay on a first date?
6. Do you swipe right if you fancy their mate in a photo?
7. Do you give people your WhatsApp number?
8. How can you trust someone to set you up on a blind date?
9. How do you reject a friend of a friend without making it awkward for everyone?
How do you deal with rejection and turn it into something positive for the next date?
Rejection can be tough, but it's essential to remember that it's not a reflection of your worth. We all face rejection at some point in our dating lives. For me, dealing with rejection involves two stages. The first is an initial emotional response, where I might feel hurt or inadequate. However, I've learned not to dwell on these feelings.
On better days, when I'm feeling confident and positive, I can brush off rejection more easily. It's a matter of perspective – recognising that not every connection will be the right one. Rejection can be a redirection to something better.
The second stage involves reflecting on the experience. Instead of romanticising what could have been, I focus on what didn't align. This helps me learn and grow, making it easier to move forward with optimism.
How do you stay consistent on dating apps?
The short answer - I don’t! Consistency on dating apps can be challenging, especially for someone like me who gets easily bored. I prefer to date when I genuinely feel ready for it. Taking breaks is perfectly fine, and I've done it myself. I believe in dating intentionally, and if I'm not in the right mindset, I won't force it. Remember, it's about quality over quantity.
Dating apps bore me, how can I make this more fun?
Dating apps can get monotonous, but there are ways to make them more enjoyable. Start by creating a specific and intentional dating profile. Be clear about what you're looking for and don't be afraid to stand out. This will attract people who align with your values and interests. Additionally, consider attending singles events or activities in your area to meet people in a more dynamic setting.
Are some dating apps better than others for finding relationships?
While I can't speak for every dating app, I've had a positive experience with Hinge. It offers a platform for more meaningful connections with its thoughtful prompts. However, your experience might vary, so it's crucial to choose the app that aligns with your dating goals and preferences.
Who should pay on a first date?
The question of who should pay on a first date is subjective. My views have evolved over the years. While I used to expect the other person to pay, I now believe that it's essential to approach it with flexibility. If someone initiates the date, they might offer to pay, but it's courteous to offer to split the bill or pay for your share. It's all about communication and finding what works best for both individuals.
Do you swipe right if you fancy their mate in a photo?
While it may be tempting to swipe right if you find someone's friend more attractive in a photo, I personally haven't done this. It could lead to awkward situations, and it's best to focus on the person you're interested in. After all, the friend might not even be available or interested in dating you.
Do you give people your WhatsApp number?
I used to find it odd when someone asked for my WhatsApp number on a dating app. However, I've become more comfortable with it over time. WhatsApp can be a convenient way to communicate, and it offers a sense of familiarity. But it's essential to prioritise your comfort and safety. If you're uncomfortable sharing your number, it's perfectly acceptable to decline and suggest continuing to communicate on the app.
How can you trust someone to set you up on a blind date?
Blind dates set up by friends can be exciting and fun. Trust your friend's judgment and believe that they have your best interests at heart. Approach the date with an open mind, and remember that it's an opportunity to meet someone new and potentially form a connection. If your friend thinks you'll hit it off, it's worth giving it a try.
How do you reject a friend of a friend without making it awkward for everyone?
If you find yourself in a situation where you need to reject a friend of a friend without causing discomfort, communication is key. Be kind and honest in your approach, focusing on your feelings and preferences rather than criticising the other person. Remember, true friends will understand and support your decisions. It's possible to navigate rejection gracefully while maintaining respect for everyone involved.
That wraps up our dating Q&A session! I hope you found these insights helpful and that they provide guidance in your dating journey. Remember, dating is about exploration and learning about yourself and others. Stay open to new experiences, communicate honestly, and trust your instincts. If you have more questions or need advice, go here. Happy dating!
Send me your dating dilemma
〰️
Send me your dating dilemma 〰️
You can contribute your stories to the Date with Confidence Podcast here. Share your best or worst dating stories, your biggest icks, dating tips you think everyone should know or ask me anything about my dating life or a burning question you need an answer for.
About Your Host
Rebecca Hawkes (you can call her Becka) is the host of The Date with Confidence Podcast, your go-to show if you’re tired of dating drama and ready to raise your standards without losing your mind (or your sense of humour).
After being blindsided by a breakup at 29, Becka turned her “WTF is happening with my life” moment into a journey of self-growth, self-worth, and a mission to help other 30-somethings stop settling. Now, she shares how to date with confidence, trust your intuition, and attract the kind of love that actually feels good.
Becka isn’t here for generic dating advice, she’s here to bring you the real, raw, and funny truths about modern dating. Expect practical tools, mindset shifts, and the occasional rant that’ll leave you feeling like you’ve just had wine with your best mate.
Want more? Sign up for her BTS with Becka newsletter here.
